MURDER, SHE WROTE: Please indulge me as I take on the character of my all time favourite detective , Jessica Fletcher in Murder she wrote. Google it if you’re not in your 30’s yet.
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Well I must admit my surprise at not having read anything lamenting the “gender” imbalances in this year’s list of Presidential candidates for the 2014 South African National General Multiparty Democratic “sigh” Elections. This I surmise is due to one of two factors. Either I haven’t consulted Google enough in past few months or we have all suddenly just relaxed about the whole “gender equality” thing. More especially since there are many pressing issues which need our urgent attention in this here election; Nkandla, Oscar, 20 years of Democracy, service delivery protests et al. Ah perhaps it is indeed a good sign, we have a good story to tell. We don’t need to harp on about the lack of women in key leadership positions anymore. More and more women in South Africa enjoy numerous positions of leadership/ power in all structures of government, including the private sector. Why…even the KwaZulu Natal Provincial {ANC} Politics are being fought under the guise of increasing gender equality at the highest level. The incumbent Premier Senzo Mchunu, must make way post- elections for a female Premier to step in his shoes in the province. It’s about time, party insiders proposed , besides it’s never happened before.
INTRODUCING…. THE FOUR LEADING LADIES.
1. HELEN ZILLE: “ I STIR THE POT JUST LIKE ANY OTHER AFRICAN WOMAN”

Current Premier of the Western Cape Province and the Democratic Alliance Presidential Candidate for this election, Helen Zille is a front-runner by a few kilometers in this election marathon. The 63-year-old former journalist has been in the game of politics long enough to convince two former fire brand, out spoken, fiercely independent women politicians such as Independent Democrat Leader Patricia De Lille and Agang leader Mamphela Ramphele to sleep with her. De lille is now the Mayor of Cape Town with a “drug problem”. Ramphele on the other hand quickly reneged on her decision to be the DA’ s Presidential Candidate. Actually this story was very confusing for me, but one can see how for a moment the two let their feelings for each other get in the way of good business. In the early 1970’s while Zille was working as a journalist for the Rand Daily Mail she exposed the truth behind the death of black Consciousness leader, Steven Bantu Biko; Mamphela Ramphele’s boyfriend and “soul-mate”. So one can cautiously assume that life long bonds must have been formed between the two women at the time. And this merger in light of this history and current context of SA politics would make sense – a perfect tit for tat. So one is left with two reasons in attempts to explain why it didn’t work out. a) They tried but the souffle crumbled before it even got out of the oven – both women probably can’t cook to save their lives in all honesty OR b)the merger and later divorce was planned. Perhaps it was an elaborate publicity stunt from the very beginning to pump up media coverage for both parties who were at the time drowning under the giant black green and gold wave of the ANC. If it was – it was simply brilliant. The two had the media practically eating out of their hands and wiping their palms clean with long salivating tongues. Which brings me to this picture. Possibly my all time favourite picture of Hellen Zille. This picture startled me at first. Then later it brought to mind similar images of independent Presidential candidate and fashion designer Diouma Diakhaté Dieng of Senegal in 2012, in traditional dress moving laboriously like Zille over large pots of rice, to prove to skeptical Senegalese voters during her Televised Election campaign that she is “woman enough” for the hot seat. She can cook, sew, look fabulous and still do politics. Many Senegalese men laughed at her- she’s not serious – they said. I find it funny that women still don’t feel good enough… being kept only in the bedroom, kitchen and boardroom they want to be everywhere. No one ever asked a male candidate to prove they can cook, let alone drive a car. But even street smart, intelligent, talented , powerful women in the form of Zille and Dieng – still need to prove that they can cook in order to win votes. Even if it’s not a cooking competition! What I like about Zille most though is her incredible sense of humour. The things she does just makes one smile . DA staff must be the happiest to come up with such amazingly creative strategies to get media attention. I admire people with a sense of humour, it’s very, very attractive. .
MAMPHELA RAMPHELE: “ I AM IN TOUCH WITH THE ANCESTORS”

When sophisticated business woman, former World Bank Chief Executive and Former Vice Chancellor of the University of Cape Town Mamphela Ramphele announced that she was starting a political party I must admit, a smile spread across my heart I was happy. The party would be called “AGANG” a seSotho doing word (present continuous verb) which directs listeners ( because it is a plural verb) to simply BUILD. Yes we must build and not destroy. Though many who are well versed in the art of politics found her unoriginal she was to me a breath of fresh sense in the midst of stale perfumes. I could at least listen to this, she didn’t automatically switch off all my vital signs. Besides we shared something in common, a love for books. Her tome ” Laying Ghosts to Rest ” was published at the right time in 2008 and provided me with some solace during a very turbulent time in South African politics. She has a lot going for her this 66-year-old former black consciousness leader. But when I saw this picture of her going to her parents grave site, I thought wow, she really brought something new to the table here. It’s common knowledge that many black South African’s consult their ancestors before embarking on life changing projects, to inform them as it were. And this is done symbolically by visiting the grave-sites of said loved ones. I thought she was brave to publicly reveal her ‘belief in ancestors” in that way – especially because most educated Africans while they may practice this in private, would not publicly admit to it as many are also Christians (Muslims) who are forbidden to acknowledge their ancestors ever existed. This was a brilliant decision on her part because it brought her closer to the black majority – ordinary Selaeo or Makgathi. Suddenly what blacks did in private was not so private anymore, people could say ” sorry I can’t do it today, I have an appointment with my grandfather at the cemetery”. The party gained momentum until the climax of the public marriage and divorce with the DA. Suddenly Shakespeare’s 116 sonnet comes to mind ” Let me not to the marriage of true minds admit impediments, love is not love which alters when it alteration finds….or bends with the remover to remove. Oh no! it is an ever fixed-mark that looks on tempest and is never shaken…” Following this shaky episode Mamphela was on every prime-time news show in the country, explaining why she dropped Hellen Zille at the alter. But what I found to be an interesting by-product of the fall out was that Ramphela could finally put a highly annoying issue to rest. Teach the nation how to correctly write and pronounce her name. The nation had been secretly struggling to pronounce her name, even black Africans where finding it hard to get it right. Mam phela Ram phele, M-a-m-p-h-e–l-a R-a m p h e-l-e she repeated on screens across of the country’s major news outlets. I found myself repeating her name under my breath too, Mamphela Ramphele, promising myself never to forget the meaning of a name.
3. ZANELE kaMAGWAZA MSIBI: ” I AM A SHOULDER TO CRY ON”

The sweetheart of KwaZulu Natal Politics. What I love most about kaMagwaza-Msibi is her smile so wide and beautiful it reminds me of Julia Roberts in the iconic Hollywood blockbuster movie “Pretty Woman”. Her smile is so disarming, relaxing she is a very nice warm, friendly and approachable person….as a result… everyone(i spoke to about her) sings her praises, she is an amazing leader, truly gifted. Her profile on Wikipedea is very brief:**** Zanele kaMagwaza-Msibi is the (NFP) and Mayor of Zululand District Municipality in KwaZulu-Natal, South Africa, and President of the National Freedom Party (NFP). She was formerly chairperson of the Inkatha Freedom Party (IFP) and the IFP’s candidate for Premier of KwaZulu-Natal in the 2009 general election.****
Her public break up with IFP leader MangoSothu Buthelezi was more than just rough, it was bloody violent. kaMagwaza Msibi is Popular, she enjoys a lot of support among men (especially) and women in the province of KwaZulu Natal. I tried to speak to Mr Buthelezi about it during lunch one Sunday afternoon, when suddenly a thick wall of ice appeared between us, I could barely make out his face which was centimeters away from mine. ” I don’t trust anything she says” he quivered his temperature obliterating the thick fog to reveal eyes glistening with hurt. I didn’t know which side to look after that. The IFP has also publicly expressed its belief that kaMagwaza Msibi is in bed with the ANC. They(NFP & ANC) currently share a coalition government in Zululand where kaMagwaza Msibi enjoys overwhelming support and is the incumbent mayor. ANC party insiders love kaMagwaza-Msibi and have intimated on more than one occasion that the party is seriously courting her in its quest to finally gain complete control of the province. Yet she is playing hard to get. But the mutual attraction between the two parties was more than an apparent during a Multiparty Prayer meeting in KwaMashu. The women there were so over joyed my collegue kept looking at me and saying ” yo these women are happy ne” to see kaMagwaza Msibi amongst ANC leaders on the podium to lead them to prayer. But they completely lost their minds ( as did kaMagwaza Msibi) at the sight of former Police Minister and ANC national executive member Bheki Cele. Women ran to the front danced and swayed, shook their bottoms and raised their arms to embrace and pull Cele to the “religious” dance floor. I must say I have never seen a reception like that before, not even for the country’s President Jacob Zuma, admittedly I have not attended enough of his political events. kaMaGwaza- Msibi herself couldn’t contain her infectious smile, glancing at Cele every five minutes. Once prayer was out they quickly huddled together like magnets laughing and giggling with each other forgetting about the “media” hovering about. KaMagwaza Msibi though was on a serious mission ” We, as the NFP have done all we can to contribute towards peace in this province, at this point prayer is our only solution” She said referring to the recent KwaMashu killings of two women friends, who were members of the IFP and NFP respectively. kaMagwaza Msibi smiled broadly at my questions and ask me who I was as her long red-painted nails lightly clawed at my torso playfully. This picture above does a great job at encapsulating her multi-layered personality. Not only is she beautiful, admired and desired by men, she is also tender enough to grieve and cry with the bereaved. Our very own Princess Diana.
4. SHAMEEM RAJBANSI – “ I AM THE WINNER OF THE GAY OSCAR AWARD”

Minority Front Party leader Shameen Rajbansi was a complete surprise for me. I didn’t know much about her or even what she looked like when I first met her. But yes you guessed it I was already in love. Because of her words. Perhaps I should just admit that it was an emotionally charged day for me in a positive way. It was the first time I returned to Coastlands Hotel in Durban’s city center where she held her party’s manifesto’s launch, after 15 years. I had to call my mother to tell her about this momentous event. I was marveling at life and was just being present in the moment when she interrupted the running order of proceedings and said,” we must cut the cake first, it’s really important”. This was to celebrate 20 years of the Minority Fronts’ existence. She then proceeded to say ” It’s been a very rough couple of years, but being the lady that I am my cake is still in tact” she said as she brushed off crumbs of the cake from her fingers. She was referring to the internal struggle for power within the party following her husband’s Amichad Rajbansi’s death two years ago. During question and answer time I ask her where she stood on the Gay issue. She said she was for gay people. She supports them. They have a proven medical hormonal defect, and there’s nothing anyone can do about it. Who is she to question God about his creation. Anyway they are generally very warm and helpful people. Who always have very unique and an interesting approach to things. She is for all minority groups. After the launch she asked me in the company of her lawyer how she did. You spoke from the heart he said and I agreed. Well you should have my number call me anytime you need questions answered. But you should go and have lunch now she advised, we’ve prepared a meal for you thank you for coming. I walked to the dining hall and sat around a crew of 6 men ( my colleague)and I was the only woman. They ranted and raved about the food.. and then came time for dessert and they all honestly couldn’t keep quiet about Shameen Rajbansi’s cake… it’s nice they talked about it and described it in ways only men can. I sat there smiling from here to ear – thinking about what she said about her cake and just thought how fun to meet people who are in the deep end and still find a way to make fun of themselves! My team and I had never been so happy. Many of those conversant in the art politics have already said – she might as well pack up and go or join the DA or ANC. But I think Shameen might still have a few surprises under her Sari. Do it for Raj, her husband, she says.